Mar 132019
 

 

Hopper's Nighthawks

NIGHTHAWKS by Edward Hopper, Art Institute of Chicago

Two in the morning. Morning, what a laugh; it’s still the middle of the night. There’s no one around at this hour: not a car, or a person, not even a dog. Silent as snow over here.

Just one block away, the place is jumping. The cabarets, clubs and outdoor cafes cater to the wide-awake crowd. Over there, the neon lights blaze like a midday sun and the sidewalks overflow with all manner of humanity; soldiers on leave out with their best girls, or making time with the ladies of the night; hustlers on the hunt for chumps and suckers looking to score. A fair number of ordinary schmoes inhabit the night: vendors, waiters, bartenders, musicians, and even a certain subset of panhandlers, the ones who aren’t slumped in alleys and doorways. It’s a swinging scene alright, but hey, this is the city that never sleeps, right?

On this street, the vibe’s different. It’s quiet, deserted as a schoolhouse in the summertime, except for the diner glowing like a meteorite in the middle of the block. The joint is lit up like Macy’s at Christmas, thanks to the newly installed fluorescents that bathe everything they touch in an icy blue haze. Old Man Wooster would be blowing a fuse if he didn’t close his haberdashery strictly by 5:00 p.m. and even earlier in the winter. Who’d want to peddle high-class fedoras by the light of that moon?

The soft-edged, many-windowed eatery puts everything inside is on full-display.  It’s like watching a play presented within a circular sweep of tile and glass Anyone can see what’s going on from every angle, can take in the swank cherry wood counters, the bare walls. Otherwise, it’s a no-frills kind of place, but they serve a good cup of java.

Inside the four main actors go about their business, three at the counter and one guy behind it who looks to be barely out of his teens. The babe in the red blouse is out late, sure, but she’s no dolly. Her outfit says secretary or maybe shop girl, but she holds herself like she’s class act. She’s making a show of minding her own business, though she tossed the kid behind the counter a million dollar smile. Could be she’s a regular, resting her tired dogs after an evening of waitressing. How else to explain a dame like her on a deserted street like this at two in the a.m., no escort in sight? Not what you’d call hot but she’s got a certain style, especially with her auburn hair down around her shoulders.

Next to her sits a guy in a sharp-looking suit. He and the good-looking gal are perched closer than two jays on a telephone wire, but she’s turned away from him. What’s that all about? Could be he made a move and she put the kibosh on it, told him to take a powder. Or they had a lovers spat, and now she’s giving the jerk the cold shoulder. Maybe they know each other—their hands on the counter are just shy of touching—but they have their own reasons for pretending different. One thing’s for sure: he hasn’t changed his seat, though there are plenty of other stools along the counter for the taking. Maybe he’s daydreaming. He’s pushed his cup aside. Even his cigarette’s got a head of ash on it. Could be he’s just another denizen of the night, lost in his own thoughts, asking himself how the hell he ended up wherever he is. Who doesn’t from time to time?

Now the fellow several seats down, the one with his back to the window? He looks a little cagey. Another suit hunched over himself; hasn’t touched his coffee. In fact, nobody seems to be drinking much, even though it’s not exactly swill they’re serving. Back to the mystery man: what’s his deal? Is he running from a secret too big to face? Is he just on the outs with the missus and holed up here because he’s got nowhere else to go? Maybe he’s just another schmo with a dead-end job, a traveling salesman peddling anything from insurance policies to vacuum cleaners. Sets his case down on the floor by his side while he grabs a bite. Traveling salesman, that’s a tough life.

The empty storefronts across the street catch the ambient glow from the diner lights. The fluorescents always manage to create their antithesis: deep pitch-black voids that seem to swallow buildings and people indiscriminately. Nothing penetrates those shadows: no life, no history, no tall tales or terrifying truths. Whatever stories the night has to yield are going to come from the violet-tinged tableau inside the all-night diner.

He sits in a black-and-white parked inconspicuously just outside the circle of light. His task is to keep an eye on the shadows, to pick out what might otherwise stay out of sight. The job is boring and maybe even a little lonely. The running narrative in his head, well, that’s just his way of passing the time. Sometimes he thinks he’s a sap for choosing law enforcement instead of a cushy office job. On long nights like this, he yearns for his warm bed and the comfort of his young wife’s embrace. Still, it’s gotta be a damn sight better than a stint abroad fighting Japs or Krauts, although he’d go if he was called up; hell yeah, he would.

He takes a sip of coffee. It’s hot and it’s good, much better than the mud they serve at the precinct. Reaching for the glazed donut on the seat beside him, he takes a bite. It could be worse, he thinks, and raises his cup in a half-salute to the diner and its motionless occupants.

The two-way crackles, startling him so he almost spills his brew. Almost. He’s young, with quick reflexes, so he’s able to spare his uniform and stifle the expletive that comes to mind. He’s trying to curse less, out of respect for the bride.

“Dispatch calling Car 201. Nighthawk, you there?”
“I’m here, Sarge.”
“Anything happening?”
“Nope, quiet as a morgue.”

The desk sergeant responds with a high-pitched laugh that whistles through the wires like a dry desert wind.

“Not the most interesting beat, Ace; I got that. You could see action yet, though, so be awake and ready to move. We got an altercation a couple blocks south of you. May need you to scoot over there if things get too hot for Ranger to handle.”
“Roger that, Sarge.”
“Now go back to your daydreaming.”

Again, the raspy laugh rolls like tumbleweed out the receiver and through the sedan.

He starts to respond, but the sergeant has clicked off. He’s old school, that one; doesn’t like the new radios. Probably wishes he could go back to the Pony Express.

The young cop takes another bite of the donut and settles back into the gloom, nothing more than a shadow himself. He trains his eyes on the diner and on the four figures thrown by his watchful presence into eternal sharp relief.

Feb 122019
 

It’s February!

This never used to be a particularly celebratory time, mind you, but I’m turning over a new leaf. Maybe I’m working off a comparison chart. December isn’t particularly joyous to me. The days are short, the energy manic. It’s cold. I hate the cold. I don’t have a holiday tradition—Christmas with the family or some such thing. Nor am I a big fan of January. Same as above but without the slight boost holiday lights offer.

But this month! Short but with more daylight. Clearly the gateway to spring, at least if the clothing catalogues piled into my mailbox are any indication. Robins sit fat and plump on the brown grass and try out their best warbles. And while Valentine’s Day is minimally uncomfortable and even a little… sad for the uncoupled of the world, well, pet love is absolutely a thing.

I admit I’ve been energized by an unexpected spate of warm weather accompanied by the sun, which has been all too scarce this winter. The thermometer climbed past sixty and stayed there—not your grandmother’s winter thaw. My neighbors were out in force, blinking at the pale sun or madly engaging in activities like roller-blading, running, strolling, or kicking and throwing balls. I swear I saw someone in his garden. Of course, we plunged back into the cold because, well, extreme weather is the new normal. Not for long, though. As you read this, temperatures are climbing again.

February holidaysFor such a diminutive month, February features a number of holidays and festivals of varied significance. Did you know February is National Cherry month? Chinese New Year occurs in February this year,  although Fat Tuesday does not. We always begin with Groundhog Day, which seems more meaningful in those parts of the country besieged by extreme weather. Never mind it’s unreasonable to expect a rodent to perform as a meteorologist. Honestly, it doesn’t make sense that we’d greet the sun with an “oh no, six more weeks of winter!” just because some little creature is afraid of his shadow. Talk about seeing the glass as half empty!

We also celebrate Black History month and Presidents’ Day. In the first instance, we set aside a month to remember pieces of history we ought to be celebrating all year round. In the second instance, we randomly meld together the birth dates of two American presidents we consider great, although I wonder if many people under forty knows which two presidents we celebrate—or can name any of the others.

Then there’s Valentine’s Day, whose origin story remains murky. The Catholic Church acknowledges three different martyred souls named Valentine. One was a third century priest who arranged for young lovers to wed in secret. In doing so, he defied the Emperor Claudius II, who figured single young men made better soldiers. Another Valentine apparently helped Christians escape the Roman prisons. That Valentine was subsequently jailed and may or may not have written a note signed “from your Valentine.” Heroic and romantic. Sigh.

John Wick and beagleValentine’s Day seems to have replaced a rather pagan fertility celebration that involved the sacrifice of both a goat and a dog. Now it’s a multi-billion-dollar business that involves reams of paper and toys with the affections of millions. Nevertheless, I’m sure we all agree that exchanging cards is better than blood-letting an animal we’d prefer to see bouncing around on YouTube in pajamas or nuzzling a baby or a cat. In fact, most of us in 2019 would go all John Wick on anyone who hurt a dog.

Speaking of movies: February is a bit of a no-man’s land in terms of sports and entertainment. The Super Bowl and the Golden Globes are both past, leaving only the Oscars, Grammys, and a couple of talent and strength competitions that compete for “most dreadful.” On the other hand, the networks bring back our favorite shows and Netflix continues to pile on the programming.

Molly and me chillinAnd nothing beats reading. After wading through three books I disliked so much I won’t mention them, I read three books in a row I really enjoyed, including an extraordinary science fiction novel and Nebula award winner in 2016 (The Fifth Season by N.K. Nemesin), a lyrical 2018 best seller (Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Ownes) and an important non-fiction read that manages to be uplifting despite its painful subject matter (Parkland by David Cullen). Even better, I read these absorbing books in front of the fireplace with the dog curled in my lap.

That’s the best kind of February.

Jul 012017
 

I love Canada. I’ve biked in Vancouver and strolled through Butchart Gardens. I’ve driven around Nova Scotia and up to Prince Edwards Island. I even studied one summer at Université Lavalle. We were two Midwest high school girls whose young chaperone ran off the second day. Suddenly unsupervised, we promptly cashed in our lunch stipend and used the money to visit bars amenable to underage drinkers where we hung with the local boys. A great way to learn colloquial French.

But I digress.

I’ve thought about living in Canada. Where would I head? The bustling province of Ontario, which holds nearly forty percent of the nation’s population? The fast-growing west? Somewhere in between? It’s a big country. Surely there’d be room for me.

My comfort level with the United States has been dropping precipitously. Even before the presidential election unleashed an undercurrent of ugly and entitled resentment, I considered an exit strategy. Blame the lack of gun control. How can anyone trust a nation so cavalier about mass shootings? Where regulations are loosening in all but seven states? Where the NRA releases thinly veiled calls to violence with every new ad? Where I can’t go into a Starbucks without worrying about getting caught in the cross-fire generated by misunderstanding or long-standing grievances?

Canada, with its open spaces, clean air, hot young leader and atmosphere of tolerance, beckoned. Cold, sure, but that’s what parkas are for. I wanted Canada. But did Canada want me, a semi-retired writer with hope in her heart?

The most common way to gain permanent residency is via Express Entry. In 2015, the Canadian government instituted the program to seek out skilled workers, entrepreneurs or investors. Six factors determine eligibility: education, language, employment experience, age, arranged employment, adaptability. One’s eligibility is calculated on a points system per an initial evaluation offered on the government website. If you reach 67 out of 100 points, you may be a candidate for immigration. No guarantees.

I felt cautiously optimistic. I had no job waiting and let’s face it, age will never again work in my favor. Yet I have several things going for me. I speak excellent English and passable French. This is point-worthy, non? An advanced degree? Mais oui. And I am nothing if not adaptable.

But as I continued to wade through the evaluation, my spirits sank. Employment experience means work history relevant to future employment, something I can’t predict. Would I be willing to invest millions, launch a startup, buy and manage a farm. Sadly, no. I couldn’t even point to family in Canada. No one waited to welcome me with open arms, save a couple of friends.

I saw the handwriting on the wall. Don’t apply. Tu n’es pas éligible.

Undaunted, I found the name of an apparently reputable law firm online, one of literally hundreds that offer free or inexpensive consultations for would-be immigrants. I caught the attorneys during a busy time. Unsurprising, given how appealing Canada looks to the rest of the world right about now.

Over three days, three attorneys were able to give me between one and four minutes apiece. Briskly, politely, or regrettably, they told me my age and lack of ties to Canada counted against me. Just what a gal needs to hear.

The third offered a thin lifeline. I could try to fill out something called a Generic Application as a self-employed person. Again, no guarantees, of course.

Nevertheless, I felt buoyed. Yes, my income is negligible and my royalties paltry, but I have listed myself on my U.S. tax forms as a writer for more than a decade. I have two published books and countless published essays to show for it. Je suis écrivain!

Have I participated in world-class cultural events, asks the application form? I’ve spoken at Harvard and signed books at Princeton. These are world-class universities. Tell me this counts.

Never mind: I’ll fill out the form and send in the fifty dollars. Meanwhile, though, I am compelled to search out other creative, original, and unique ways to convince Canada I can contribute to its culture. For instance, I could:

  1. set my new novel in Canada
  2. hire a Canadian editor
  3. write for a local paper
  4. write a new verse to the national anthem (although it’s fine, really)
  5. write about moving to Canada
  6. write a reality show in which a sophisticated older American woman selects from among a group of eligible Canadian men vying for her hand in marriage.

O Canada, I pledge my love and allegiance. Please let me in.